The cast of Magnum P.I. try to sacrifice Noel to a volcano. All hopes of being rescued rest on Paul Panfer, an internet sensation who remakes Elvis films on his mobile phone.

Noel gets fantasy block (a weird strain of writer's block) and if he doesn't overcome this and write an ending to the show, Terry, his only viewer, will be killed by an asteroid

Noel's show is turned into a reality TV programme by fantasy terrorist Reality Man. Noel is evicted back to reality and gets a job working in a greasy spoon café.

Noel realises he is the only person in the show who isn't cool. He has until the end of the episode to become cool, otherwise he will be destroyed by a race of alien cucumbers.

Noel has until the end of the episode to boost the ratings from nine to 25. If he doesn't, his show will be axed and he and all his characters will be put into storage.